Why Drinking Beer is Awesome

Let it never be said that drinking isn’t essential to having a good time. Take, for example, these two guys video taped at the Pittsburgh Pirates - Atlanta Braves game July 14th. Fueled by hours of drinking liquid courage, they succumbed to their friends’ chants and jumped from the bleachers onto the field during a rain delay. The only problem is that at this point in the night, as you’ll see in the video, it seems they and their friends are the only ones left in the park.



In the end, what could have been a well thought-out streak across the outfield grass to the cheers of thousands (given that the Braves get that many spectators) basically ended up like spending three nights in jail for running across your parent's backyard. Awesome, guys…you are truly men amongst boys.

Via Dan at the Red Sox Monster. Another man amongst boys.

Read more!

The Frugal Footballer

If I just signed a multimillion dollar contract, penny-pinching would be the last thing on my mind. Well, I'm clearly no Fernando Torres, who isn't nearly as big of a self-induldgent prick as I would be.

Torres just signed a $42 million contract with Liverpool. But while A-Rod would have called upon the manliest strippers he could find, Torres got dropped off at the airport by his parents and treated his girlfriend to a $176 bargain flight from Madrid to Liverpool.

Somewhere in L.A., David Beckham is shaking his head.

Read more!

Burn, Barry. Burn.

The bonfire was always a big deal in my town when I was younger. It was held on a field adjacent to the high school (we only had one) and was a part of the annual fall season pep rally. You know, a real New England affair. Until a foreign exchange student got alcohol poisoning my freshman year of high school, forever committing the yearly bonfire to memory - stupid foreigners. So it will come to no surprise that I plan on heading to Chicago for the Greatest. Bonfire. Ever.

As part of a Barry Bonds boycott, Bleachers Sports, a 15-year veteran of the Chicago sports memorabilia scene, plans to burn all of it's Bonds merchandise the day he breaks Hank Aaron’s home run record. Owner Keith McDonough has removed all Bonds baseball cards from a collection that’s about 5 million deep, including autographed items as well, and will burn each and every one. "Bonds knew he was taking performance-enhancing drugs, and he continued to take them after Major League Baseball declared their use to be illegal," he told chicagosports.com. "We have hundreds of children as customers and at least they will know that we do not support attaining athletic superiority through chemical ingestion. Quite simply, we want kids to say 'no' to taking steroids and any other drugs like this, so we will at least not sell Barry Bonds in our store."

At least now we know where Bud Selig's going to be the night Bonds breaks the record.

Via Ben Maller.

Read more!

Strahan's Wallet Getting a Little Thin?

Living in New York City is notoriously tough on the wallet, and sometimes the locals need to find extra work on the side. But you wouldn't think an NFL player would experience the same need to tighten the purse strings. Unfortunately that's not the case when your ex-wife is sucking your account dry.

Giant's defensive end Michael Strahan, who's recently found extra change by appearing in Subway commercials, has had to get a second job with the DIY Network (whosit?) working on the show Backyard Stadiums. He'll be helping families design and build sports facilities in their backyards. And some of Strahan's athlete friends, like MLS star David Beckham Clint Mathis, NBA star Dwyane Wade Darryl Dawkins, former NFL quarterback Dan Marino Neil O'Donnell and pro skateboarder Tony Hawk Dan MacFarlane, will be joining him.

Add the show to Strahan's increasing team frustrations, and you can assume life has been good for the big man.

Read more!

Marcus Bent Got Screwed Because His Girlfriend Did First

Marcus Bent is an English soccer player.

Danielle Lloyd honestly thought Winston Churchill was the first black president of the United States (“There’s a statue of him near me – it’s black”), but that’s neither here nor there. The ex-Miss Great Britain was also the only thing about Bent that anyone cared about -until he dumped her for having a “marathon sex session” with 50 Cent and telling the tabloids about it.

Danielle, 23, met rap hardman Fiddy at his Hammersmith Apollo gig last week. And just hours later Fiddy, 32, invited her back to his £2,500-per-night suite at the swanky Landmark Hotel in West London..."Danielle was bragging to pals about how big he was - all over."

"She said he's a mega-star in more ways than one." And according to a bystander: "She looked a bit wobbly after her late night."

It must suck to be Marcus Bent. No one knows who you are; your dumb, hot girlfriend is telling the world she had to find another man to make her walk funny; and the worst part is that 50 Cent already made you look like a pussy by default – banging your girlfriend just made it sweeter for him.

Read more!