The Red Carpet Highlight Reel

The favorite part of the Grammy’s for me is the Red Carpet Pre Show. I mean honestly, if I wanted to watch the Billboard Awards I would. Anyway, I couldn’t be more proud of my predictions finally coming to fruition (I should run that network): Bye-bye to Kathy Griffin, Star Jones and Isaac Mizrahi. The E! Red Carpet show was the best I’ve seen in a while. I was impressed that Ryan Seacrest does, in fact, have a few reporting skills. He didn’t shy away from asking the uncomfortable questions, specifically with the Dixie Chicks, who went on to perform in front of what I assume was the largest crowd since their fallout, and show sincere shock and humility while accepting their Grammys (yes, as in "more than one"). It was entertaining, overall, and so, in a Top 10 fashion, I’ve put together my own highlight reel. Enjoy.


1.) I’m so used to hating Christina Aguilera’s entire wardrobe choice that I was surprised to only hate her hair. As for her dress, it was gorgeous. Except for the panty line.

2.) Honestly, Pink, a dress does not a woman make. Worst. Transvestite. Ever.

3.) Fergie, or Stacy Ferguson, showed up looking great as usual from the neck down. The outfit was missing one essential accessory thought, but with a body like that no one’s looking at her face anyway.

4.) Scarlett, who we learn later is recording her first album (*MISTAKE*MISTAKE*MISTAKE*MISTAKE*) refused to admit that she isn’t dating Justin Timberlake. Instead she answered the question without actually answering it…simply stating that she doesn’t pay attention to tabloid fodder. Good for her, but Giuliana never pulled the actual answer out of her. Regardless, Johansson better keep her damn hands off.

(And speaking of Justin, he was the artist chosen for the inaugural and possibly last “My Grammy Moment” contest, in which he’ll perform a duet with one lucky contestant who will be voted for and announced during the show. I don’t expect him to be rude to any of the contestants or anything, he’s too greatful for his fans to do something like that, but one rumor passed to me by an insider is that he was pretty pissed with his management that they agreed to this stunt without first asking him. Whether or not that holds true, he’s doing it, and he’ll have no problem charming anyone…that’s something he just can’t help.)

5.) John Legend…I’m sorry, but he just can’t go wrong.

6.) I don’t think Paula Abdul was drunk, which was a nice change. But, if you were paying attention between her and Seacrest spewing about American Idol, she alluded to Paul McCartney’s history of blowing off American Idol as a special guest. She cut herself off before giving too much away, but it’s still fun to speculate. I say, good job, Sir Paul. Run from that show. And run fast.

7.) Honestly, people. What's Beyonce got that I ain’t got? Beauty? Talent? A hot body and great personality? Psh…I’ve got all that. Well, maybe not. But try taking all that away from her and see what you’d be left with. A big. Fat. Nothing. That’s what.

8.) It was great to see Bella Fleck and the Flecktones get camera time …even a few cut away shots. And we found out later that they won a Grammy last night…congrats, guys. Much deserved.

9.) John Mayer was looking less pasty than usual. He was also without Jessica Simpson (who has no place at the Grammy’s. Or the Oscars for that matter). No word as to who he was with later in the night. He speaks Japanese. And he asked the impossible: for Seacrest act like a man.

10.) The show ended with an interview with Quentin Tarantino who proves that being insane can, in fact, be functional and cool. And then he said that Paula Abdul looked hot in her dress. And he new who Jay Manuel was. Jay is Tyra’s right-hand woman on America’s Next Top Model. And he’s fabulous. As is Quentin.

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